Question

In some moments i can be so exited, but others really petrified. Some feel as if i am making a massive mistake, but others feel like a wonderful opportunity provided by a series of thoughts based on my past experiences. Memories? Some days i think i will struggle to return to that place of co-existing with the sun and the moon. Focused on breath and space and light; not students and marking and years spent trying to inspire classrooms full of mixed ability flesh.  Returning will inevitably force me inward, I wonder how far i will be able to retract, sharing experiences with another person so physically and emotionally attached. In the past i have achieved most when i have been alone. I am heading off from a very different place than i did ten years ago, i think.

What about terrorism and earthquakes and typhoons and bus crashes and bad ferries and muggers and corrupt cops and snakes and shrimp paste?

lakes, mountains, deserts, metropolis cities, tropical beaches, life experiences, space, people, relaxation, excitement,  fate, culture, curry!

Today it feels so hard to know why i am leaving what is considered a good safe  life.

6 comments

  1. ashcroft54

    Ok…the answer you are looking for is simple. When you know what you want, everything will fall inti place.

    A buddiest told me this line…we all know the path, but only few walk it.

  2. nonrecourse

    I hear you! Seems like just when you’re ready to flee a place, the place conspires to be the most warm, fun, lovable place it’s ever been. Now that I’m a week from departure, I’m finally thinking about how many questions remain unanswered, and it’s getting a little scary.
    But it beats the banality of so many of the alternatives, doesn’t it? We’ve been given a great gift, this ability to take off and explore, and we’d be ungrateful boobs to pass that up.

    • pinkybinks

      Deffo. I agree that heading off is the best thing to do….explore the earth and have as much fun and as many experiences as you can. Shit happerns…but so does mind blowing. change is good, just a little scarey at times. Have a fantastic time 🙂

  3. Julia

    Ha! Just typed in 3 different responses and deleted them all.

    ohh, poignancy, George, sharing, retracting, travelling alone, travelling with other, danger, safety.

    ecstacy of the new, terror of intimacy, ecstacy of intimacy, terror of the new.

Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s